Little Jermo's Adventures in Slumberland

Really really embarrasing: a couple of nights ago, I fell out of bed.

Look, I have absolutely no idea how it happened. I haven't fallen out of bed since I was, jeepers, six? I was having a very peculiar dream about trying very hard to get up and get out of bed, when... WHAMMO! I was awakened by the sensation of my face + my entire body weight abruptly meeting our bedroom floor. It really, really hurt.

Also, it caused a terrific racket. Immediately, the cats flipped out and began tearing through the bedroom and the house, knocking over vases and other breakables. Carey sat bolt upright and started screaming "OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD! YOU LANDED ON GILBERT!"

Well, no, I hadn't landed on Gilbert, but I was too shocked, irritated and embarrassed to debate the issue with her.

But what grown-up does that? Falling out of bed? What is this, amateur night?